Hey Reader! This was a lovely, long week filled with friends. People I don’t see enough and one person I hadn’t seen since I was fourteen years old. Lunch with a high school friend who’s moving away. Family visits and performances for a room sprinkled with strangers. I needed that reminder of how beautiful life is when we connect with others. Even the least encounter enriches me: with new thoughts, experiences, emotions, and understanding. But not every interaction is positive. Sometimes,...
8 days ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! There’s an odd prejudice against joy that some people develop as they age. But jubilation isn’t the exclusive province of the young. After all, who looks at misery and grief and says: That’s what I want when I grow up? Philosophers and scientists have debated and explored joy, and what makes a person happy. Consensus points to two things. Happy people are ones who choose to be happy, no matter what happens. If you look at everything that happens as something that happens for you...
15 days ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! This morning, something crashed through a wire fence as I was walking my dog through the woods. Was it a fox? A large rabbit? A bobcat? I tightened my hand on my dog’s leash. The animal was moving away through the low scrub on my left. I didn’t want to make any noise that might attract it. For a few tense seconds, the animal seemed to spin in circles in the tall grass. Then it leaped at the fence. But instead of moving through, it rebounded, landing awkwardly on its hindquarters....
22 days ago • 2 min read
Hey Reader! A friend once told me a story about bamboo farmers. Every day, they water their bamboo. Every day, they stick to their plan. They may not see any sign of growth for THREE YEARS. And yet, every day, they water their bamboo. They don’t give up. Then, one day, the bamboo pierces through the ground and it begins to grow. And grow. And grow. In fact, it might grow more than a foot a day. After two months, a stalk of giant timber bamboo goes from nothing to ninety feet tall! They kept...
29 days ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! I’ve worked in the events industry for most of my life. If you’re unfamiliar with the business, it’s a high-stress job with significant potential for scope creep and irregular hours. On-site at my most recent event, people greeting me didn’t say ‘hello.’ Instead, they asked me if I was sleeping. I know they meant it in jest. But it emphasized how toxic work environments can be when we try to pretend we’re superhuman. I’m no longer in my twenties. I’m old enough to know I better...
about 1 month ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! A while back, I stumbled across a story about a Buddhist monk and his young disciple. The monk-in-training, on fire with the desire to eliminate suffering, eventually got stuck. In his quest to do no harm, he wasn’t sure how to perform the simplest daily functions. How could he go for a walk? He might trample a bug. How could he eat? By pulling a carrot from the earth, he would end its life. He brought this anguish to his teacher. In response, the old monk laughed. ”You have to...
about 1 month ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! Things are hot out there. Not only temperature wise, but conversationally. It feels like so much is at stake that it’s hard to stay casual. That’s why I like the idea of being a benevolent alien. It’s a concept I ran across in a Facebook thread I can’t find anymore. But I think I found its source. Buddhists view attachments—to people, ideas, possessions, expectations, etc.—as a cause of suffering. And nothing causes more suffering than trying to change someone’s mind. Especially...
about 2 months ago • 1 min read
Hey Reader! For a brief, glorious year, I worked overseas as a performer/corporate trainer at a comedy theater in Amsterdam. In addition to a dozen American cast-mates, there were several Dutch office workers, bar, and front-of-house staff to know. The foreignness of their names and my porous memory meant it took longer than normal to remember who was whom. Embarrassed, I sought to overcome that by spending more time chit-chatting with people than I was inclined to, which led to an...
about 2 months ago • 5 min read
Hey Reader! If you’ve ever broken up with a friend, you know how gut-wrenching it can be. After all, friends keep our confidences. With our truest friends, we put aside our masks and feel safe being who we really are. We go to them with our hopes and fears. We trust their advice. Friends are our most intimate companions. That’s what makes breaking up with them so painful. Friends become even more precious as we get older. When we grow into adulthood and begin focusing on career, romance,...
2 months ago • 2 min read